NFL Week 11 Picks and Analysis – FootballSunday, November 20, 2011 1:38
Game picks for Week 11 of the 2011 NFL football season and more on Joe Paterno and the Penn State child sex abuse scandal.
NFL 2011 Week 11 Picks & Analysis
It never ends in America.
When the world justifiably comes down on an individual or group of people the ensuing media shit-storm and theatrics staged in the “court of public opinion” only distract from what our attention should be singularly focused on.
Sept 11th, 2001: a bunch of Saudi Arabian religious fanatics led by a loosely knit bunch of inhuman terrorists…well, you know the rest of that horrific story.
Instead of reacting to the unprovoked attack resulting in the deaths of 2700+ people with national mourning, collective resolve, and unified rational policy to thwart future attacks, we responded like perpetually frightened school children, hiding under desks, heads between our legs, furiously trying to kiss our asses goodbye–because Jesus was waiting for us and he would defeat the other evil, and false Gods, “those people” worship.
- The civil liberty crushing Patriot Act
- Treasury busting wars
- Government sponsored rendition and torture
- Militarized cops who confront peaceful protestors with full riot gear, blatant brutality, and piggish arrogance…
- The TSA and Homeland security–both created by “small government Republicans”…
We were a nation awash in fear.
The cacophony of justified outrage over the child-rape scandal Joe Paterno enabled at Penn State is the latest story that proves how our initial reaction to earth-shaking events inevitably evolves into the absurd and irrational–and ends up marginalizing the true victims.
Jerry Sandusky will get his justice–here, I’ll steal a line from a fellow writer–”seven inches at a time” in some prison bathroom.
Joe Paterno’s legacy–no matter the judicial outcome of the criminal activity he tacitly allowed–will forever be stained like grimy shower tile.
Hopefully the NCAA will vacate every victory of Sandusky’s tenure as the Nittany Lion defensive coordinator. That would make Paterno the second winningest coach in college football history and would be more punishment to Paterno than any jail term.
To me, these are rational, appropriate consequences for inexcusable crimes and moral abdication.
As usual, Americans never let rationality stand in the way of insanity…
Fanatics want Paterno’s name removed from the library his money helped build. The Penn State board of trustees is considering removing a statue of Paterno from outside of Beaver Stadium.
Former Penn State and NFL great Franco Harris was removed as a spokesman for a local casino and dismissed as chairman of Pittsburgh Promise, which provides college scholarships to graduates of Pittsburgh Public Schools, because of his idiotic but passionate defense of Paterno.
Excuse me, I thought this was America, where even successful, famous men like Franco have the inalienable right to be tone-deaf assholes if they so choose.
You know what? Count me in. I guess you can’t punish these guys enough.
But, I can’t help asking…When does it end?
As the PSU investigation drains into a much deeper and more perverted cesspool…when the tentacles of the fanatical “Penn State Mafia” are exposed to a shocked nation–and make no mistake, they engulf every political and cultural institution in the state, including the governor’s office–what further punishment can us non-deviants propose to administer?
- Every Penn State Alum must have the initials CM tattooed on his forehead.
- PSU sports teams must rename themselves the Nittany Perverts.
- Cameras must be installed in every shower stall and locker room.
- The four-legged Penn State Nittany Lion mascot–not the guy in the lion suit, unless he horses around too much with fans–will be castrated at mid-field at the next year’s home opener.
What do you think the ratings would be for that broadcast?
Yeah, yeah, okay…I know…”Too soon, Gairzo, too soon.”
The reason for my feeble attempt at humor is, because like the media and public’s reaction to date, any of the above punishments would be justified by the same rhetoric…”We have to do what’s best for the children…The children are our future…We must protect THE CHILDREN!”
A lie we love to believe.
If we as a nation truly cared about “the children” our politicians would put the highest priority on quality education, not a state of permanent war.
Teachers’ unions would be the ones demanding annual testing and accountability of their members.
If adults took their responsibilities as parents seriously, they wouldn’t rush out to get Cody or Brianna the hottest new iPhone…they wouldn’t allow third graders to text during class or teenagers to have unfettered access to “Butt-Hole Coeds” on the laptops in their rooms–you know, the rooms with locks on the door…
We lie because the truth frightens us.
The Jerry Sandusky’s of the world, and the friends who protect them, are not confined to Penn State or the local rectory at St. Mary’s. These guys are everywhere folks. They are our golfing buddies, our store clerks and our friendly mechanics.
When we believe we can solve a social problem that we are too scared to even talk about by tearing down statues or erasing names from library granite, we only prove our ability to believe anything to cover our collective ass or expiate our collective guilt.
Next thing you know, we’ll call pizza a vegetable.
Week 11 Picks
You gotta give Tim Tebow props. He is such a great story. He is one of those rare people, inexplicable, unique…
Almost makes you want to be a virgin…
The historical sports figure most like Tim Tebow has to be Mark “The Bird” Fidrych. For two short years he made the national past time a lot more fun with his colorful exploits on MLB’s pitchers mounds.
Fans love the two athletes for vastly different reasons. Fidrych dominated baseball hitters with great stuff and an almost Zen-like relationship with the mound. He shook every teammate’s hand after each victory and talked to himself like a mad scientist before delivering a pitch.
Tebow is riding the Jesus wave and is finding miraculous ways to win games against teams he should lose to.
The trait the two athletes share-and what made them national cultural icons of their day–is an infectious love of what they do, an indomitable spirit to get it done and an innate honesty to be nothing more than themselves.
Such phenoms are like comets; they rarely are seen and don’t stay around long enough–we should just enjoy the ride.
Last Week’s Picks
Week 10: 7 – 9 (.357)
Overall Tally: 65 – 75 – 6 (.464)
At .464 The Gairzo is about .140 short of the winners circle.
In other words if you bet the way I told you to you would be cursing at me through your computer screen.
What’s that? I can’t hear you…
So this is the week I reexamine my patented research methods. I’m switching from Stolichnaya, the premiere Russian Vodka, to Svedka, a Swedish concoction which is said to be a bit crisper…distilled five times…
Excuse me while I test out that theory…
Wow, that fifth time does the trick…definitely…Just a couple more swigs…and a refill…
…Oh yeah, things are becoming much clearer…
They better…I managed only the Upset Special because the Bengals and Jets failed me.
Specials Tally: 21 – 18 – 1 (.538)
This Week’s Picks
Game of the Week (4 – 6)
The only game worthy of this Special is the Big Apple showdown between the G-Men and the Eagles. A lot of experts are picking the desperate, star-studded Eagles. I’m laying the line and going with the G-Men, who should be just as desperate after a nail biting loss to the Niners.
Manning is a better QB than Michael Vick’s replacement, Vince Young, and right now the NFC East is the Giants’ for the taking.
New York 30, Philadelphia 17
Upset Special (7 – 2 – 1)
We’ve been perched on the Cardinals’ wings all year. Why get off now when all Arizona has to do is beat a division rival on the road? Ken Whisenhut is from the Cowher school of thought: division games are the key to winning a championship. Sure, playing in close games doesn’t mean a whole lot if you lose them–except to guys like me who will gladly take the ten points the gangsters are giving.
Arizona can be run on but the Gold Miners are vulnerable through the air–you might see both teams return a kick for a TD. San Fran will likely pull this one out with a late field goal, and that’s okay with me.
San Fran 23, Arizona 21
Lock of the Week (5 – 5)
The Bolts will never say it, but they are playing like a team that is tiring of Norv Turner–and so are their fans.
Phillip Rivers has seemed a second slow in his decision-making and a foot awry in his accuracy.
Jay Cutler looks like a gunslinger who is starting to master the new six-shooters Mike Martz has given him. Matt Forte is a beast who should be paid handsomely. Unfortunately running backs are the most easily replaced skill players in the game.
Devin Hester wins it with yet another return.
Chicago 29, San Diego 17
Over/Under of the Week (5 – 5)
There hasn’t been a total I liked going over in a month. We’ll play it close to the cummerbund and expect the Jags and Browns–two of the NFL’s worst offenses–to trade safeties and field goals.
Browns 15, Jaguars 10
As always, my lines are found here: http://www.footballlocks.com/nfl_lines.shtml
My picks can be found below in italic…
NFL Lines For Week 11, 11/20 – 11/21, 2011
|Date & Time||Favorite||Line||Underdog||Total|
|11/20 4:15 ET||At Atlanta||-6.5||Tennessee||44|
|11/20 1:00 ET||At Miami||-3||Buffalo||43|
|11/20 1:00 ET||At Baltimore||-7||Cincinnati||40.5|
|11/20 1:00 ET||At Cleveland||-1 O/U||Jacksonville||34|
|11/20 1:00 ET||At Minnesota||-1||Oakland||45.5|
|11/20 1:00 ET||At Detroit||-7||Carolina||47.5|
|11/20 1:00 ET||At Green Bay||-14||Tampa Bay||48.5|
|11/20 1:00 ET||Dallas||-7||At Washington||41.5|
|11/20 4:05 ET||At San Francisco||-10 US||Arizona||40.5|
|11/20 4:05 ET||At St. Louis||-3||Seattle||39|
|11/20 4:15 ET||At Chicago LW||-3.5||San Diego||45|
|11/20 8:30 ET||At Giants GW||-5.5||Philadelphia||45.5|
|11/21 8:35 ET||At New England||-15||Kansas City||46.5|
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